We're at the one year mark. In just 52 short weeks, our country as a whole will be choosing its next Executive Commander. And what is more apt fodder for a drinking game?

Here's the rules: Every week, between now and Election Day 2008, you're responsible for imbibing a specific amount of your favorite drink. And then the next week you double it. You have the entire week to drink it, so it really shouldn't be a problem. And, tell you what, we'll start you off with a really small amount so that you can ease into this.

So, let's get this going. Salud!

Week 1: 0.0001220703125 fluid ounces
This is a less alcohol than a Conservative Christian drinks in a week by accident, so it should be no problem for you, even if you are a Conservative Christian. You can either shoot it all at once or drink 1.7438616071428571428571428571429e-5 fluid ounces per day for seven days. Your choice. (You may need an electron microscope for precision's sake.)

Week 2: 0.000244140625 fluid ounces
Still, not a whole lot. In fact, the next couple months are gonna be boring. You might even mend relations with family members. But don't worry; those re-connections will be temporary.

Week 14: 1 fluid ounce
This is essentially equal to one shot glass full of your favorite drink. We recommend you set it on fire and toast Rudy Giuliani before shooting it.

Week 17: 8 fluid ounces
About eight shot glasses full of fluid. Depending on what you're drinking, you might actually be feeling something. Why not do a shot a day all week and then celebrate by having a shot?

Week 22: 16 pints
This is the same amount that the average Indecision 2008 writer drinks during a "dry out" week. You should have no problem managing this.

Week 23: 32 pints
About the amount a keg holds. This is the same amount that the average Indecision 2008 writer drinks during a regular week. Get a really loud alarm clock.

Week 26: 32 gallons
You're at the halfway mark. This is the approximate amount of two kegs. If you quit your job, hunker down and keep drinking, you can get all this down and still end up standing next week. But, you've gotta drink twice as much next week. So, maybe, right about now might be the time to start inviting some friends to join in.

Week 30: 512 gallons
32 kegs! Just start walking into bars and buying everything you see. Get all the old men and frat boys sitting there to lend you a hand. This is the way candidates used to campaign back in the old days.

Week 40: 524,288 gallons
You and your entourage of patriotic drunkards have almost certainly drunk your voting district (and the seven neighboring ones) dry by this point. You've got to get out there and start going state by state. It shouldn't be too hard to find willing helpers, if you follow the candidates' tour buses.

Week 50: 536,870,912 gallons
To get this all down, you're going to have to be a uniter, not a divider. Arbitrary titles like Democrat, Republican, Liberal, Conservative, Gay and Closeted Gay mean nothing. You need to look into people's hearts and see them for what they really are: people who can help you drink five oil tankers' worth of alcohol. You're in the home stretch.

Week 52 - Election Week!: 2,147,483,648 gallons
If you divide this up into seven days, it's 306,783,378 gallons per day. Assuming you can get every single citizen of the United States of America to help you drink it, come November 5th, Election Day, everybody needs to drink 1.02 gallons or 8 generous pints before walking into the voting booths.

As it turns out, this is the exact amount of alcohol necessary to put a person in the proper mindset for choosing our next Executive Commander.

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