InKEYEScision 2008 Officially Endorses Alan Keyes for President
It has been of dismay for all of us here at Indecision 2008 to finally come terms with a simple fact about this current presidential race: Each and every one of the three media darling candidates has, in the course of campaigning, proven themselves to be completely unworthy of the office of which they seek.
Barack Obama lacks experience and has shown us time and again that he is utterly incapable of answering a telephone after 2:30 or so a.m. Also, he's friends with a guy who says mean things about America sometimes, and we don't like that.
Hillary Clinton has outed herself as a liar -- and not just any kind of liar, but one who isn't smart enough to not lie about things that television crews have caught on videotape. And we think her husband is kind of a douche these days.
And John McCain is old and he has a weird unsightly growth on the side of his face. What the hell is up with that thing? It's weird.
For these reasons, and many more, we are proud to announce -- on this glorious day of April something or other -- that the Indecision 2008 web team has decided to endorse -- excitedly and unequivocally and super-excitedly -- the presidential candidacy of one Mr. Alan Lee Keyes, ambassador, author, humanitarian, talk show host, friend.
What brought us around? Well, lets just say that we learned a thing or two about Mr. Keyes...
Did you know that if you had a puppy, and you were running late on your way home from work, Alan Keyes would feed your puppy for you, assuming you had given him a spare set of house keys?
Did you know that Alan Keyes is an anagram for "a snaky eel"?
Did you know that Alan Keyes loves you almost as much as you love America? Which is almost as much as Alan Keyes loves America.
Did you know that Alan Keyes is magnanimous, munificent, chivalrous, benevolent and unselfish? Or that he's always willing to lend out his thesaurus?
Did you know that Alan Keyes is a very generous employer and is willing to take untrained, inexperienced web writers onto his campaign's PR staff?
Did you know that Alan Keyes is an anagram for "alaen keys"?
By the way, please feel free to write us with any Alan Keyes related news that you should come across. And we mean any. You might think it's unimportant, but, believe me, we will feel otherwise.
I mean, we're going to be writing a lot of stories about Alan Keyes in the upcoming months. And, uh... there's not a lot out there. No. But, um, we'll figure it out.
The opinions and ideas expressed herein are those of the indecision2008 editorial board and do not represent those of Comedy Partners, its parent company, and/or its affiliates or any of the foregoing's agents, employees, or assigns.
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I hear both of Alan Keyes parents are black that is why I throw my support to the first real black candidate!!
Alan Keyes is currently running as an Independant and is on the ballot in CO.
There are now petition drives going on in many states to acquire ballot access, in some he will be a write-in candidate. The newly formed America's Independent Party endorses him for president (www.aipnc.com). The American Independent Party of CA has recently switched their national affiliation from the Constitution Party to America's Independent party, making the new party the third largest based on voter registration.
Alan holds question & answer conference calls each Tues. & Thurs. 10pm EST at: (231) 962-8000, Access Code 340794#. Dr. Keyes answers each question in detail and noone is muted so you never know what to expect. Here are audio links to listen to a few:
June 17th: http://www.keyesarchives.com/play.php?mp3=251
June 19th: http://www.keyesarchives.com/play.php?mp3=252
June 26th:
http://www.keyesarchives.com/play.php?mp3=254 06-30-2008
The most recent news I can find is his decision to run for president in the CP, swearing off the GOP a couple of weeks ago, as reported in Talk Action, CP online blog site.
http://www.talk2action.org/story/2008/4/24/142326/723
The Washington Post has his campaign tracker:
http://projects.washingtonpost.com/2008-presidential-candidates/alan-keyes
I need the wisdom of Alan Keyes this election. If I can't cast my vote for him, how do I chose between Pro-choice Obama, who may revitalize the black community, and Pro-election candidate McCain? Will I ever get to vote for a Pro Life candidate?
We believe that Allen Keyes is one man that many others (Americans who want to run for President) would or never could compete with fairly and win. He has honesty, charisma, education and govenment knowledge beyond any one running today. He is a true American with true constitutional ideas and he is who he says he is and he is not fake.
His words are never "flip flop", a word so silly that only low someone with low IQ intellegence would be able to think up!!!!
He may be all you stated but just maybe he knows that most folks have a low attention span and he tries hard to get his ideas understood. He seems (sadly) to have trouble getting any news coverage that he deserves. Maybe there is a reason we are not aware of?
I would believe him to be burnt out by now, with all he has done continues doing ... he is dedicated, preseverent, forth right and his convictions remain the same at all times. We say go Keyes!!! We are behind you. See you in Kansas City!!!! He will get America On the right track.
I said 10 supporters not 12! Can't you boneheads get anything correct?
Oh ye of little faith! Please, whether you want to improve your education, or just be entertained, you are cordially invited to visit our internet community at http://www.alankeyes.com. Dr. Keyes is a true American treasure. Please come read or listen to his speeches
You say that you won't have enough to write about him. You could post a speech a week (yes, he has granted permission) from now until the end of his second term, and you would never run out of thought-provoking and enlightening material!
Please, come to visit us!
All hail keyes and his 10 supporters from his site. Let's double their support to 20. Let's just make sure he starts out as dog catcher.
Although he did a great job on that Borat movie.
Keyes/Trump...does that mean Piers Morgan will be our new Secretary of State? Shades of Kissinger!!
wow neat