April 21st at 12:06PM
Campaigning in the World of Warcraft
Update: Old school gamer and author of this post Tony DiGerolamo responds to all the haters.
There's a lot of talk lately about what Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama have to do to win in Pennsylvania tomorrow. But take the long view and you realize that with each passing election, using the Internet to get votes becomes more and more crucial overall. Candidates today have to speak not only to the casual web surfer, but also to those for whom the Internet is a lifestyle choice. So, here are some tips for the candidates courting the World of Warcraft vote:
 The Vote |
Obama Onscreen name: GuTwReNcHeR |
Clinton Onscreen name: Blood_Storm |
McCain Onscreen name: Deathstalker49 |
| Druid | Likes: His stance on global warming and Humane Goblin Population Control propsal. Dislikes: Wants to see more Elf advisors in campaign |
Likes: Her support for mercury regulations in factory emissions. Dislikes: Her dominant stance disrupts Feral Combat spells. |
Likes: His badger-like commitment to the Iraq War. Dislikes: Refuse to lower taxes on scimitars. |
| Mage | Likes: His intelligence and commitment to education. Dislikes: His support for H.R. 977, the Fireball Limitation Act. |
Likes: That she made that Bosnia sniper story disappear like magic. Dislikes: That she won't support David Blaine's bid for Senate. |
Likes: His wizened old coot-like visage. Dislikes: That he fired Merlin when he was his intern. |
| Paladin | Likes: The way he wants to save everyone in America from evil. Dislikes: That he would treat Trolls and Blood Elves as equals. |
Likes: Her quest for a national health care plan to heal the sick. Dislikes: Lack of funding for holy grail quests. |
Likes: His War Hero persona. Dislikes: That he takes donations from Neocons and other undead. |
| Priests | Likes: That he continues to support his cleric, Rev. Wright. That he doesn't worship a god that would grant him more powerful spells. Dislikes: That he would treat Trolls and Blood Elves as equals. |
Likes: The goddess-like way she runs her campaign, demanding worship from all. Dislikes: That her campaign advisors secretly met with Nath, Ogre god of war. |
Likes: His magic lute that has the ability to charm Orcs. Dislikes: His inability to tell Al Qaeda from other insurgents and his penchant for screaming into his Internet headset during battle. |
| Rogue | Likes: That his tax proposal will take from the rich. Dislikes: That he doesn't keep the taxes for his guild. |
Likes: Her husband's ability to sneak away with interns unseen. Dislikes: Her support for a law allowing Orcs to marry. |
Likes: The way he ruthlessly back-stabbed his GOP opponents. Dislikes: The way he got back-stabbed by Bush in 2000. |
| Death Knight | Likes: His +7 Axe of Reaving. Dislikes: This thing you humans call "humanity". |
Likes: Her sponsorship of H.R.335, which would extend health-care to undead spouses. Dislikes: That she continues to debate her opponents rather than slay them. |
Likes: His lich-like visage and support for global conquest. Dislikes: His refusal to eat the heart of his enemies. |
Ask
backflip
blinklist
BlogBookmark
Bloglines
BlogMarks
Blogsvine
BUMPzee!
CiteULike
co.mments
Connotea
del.icio.us
DotNetKicks
Digg
diigo
dropjack.com
dzone
Facebook
Fark
Faves
Feed Me Links
Friendsite
folkd.com
Furl
Google
Hugg
Jeqq
Kaboodle
linkaGoGo
LinksMarker
Ma.gnolia
Mister Wong
Mixx
MySpace
MyWeb
Netvouz
Newsvine
PlugIM
popcurrent
Propeller
Reddit
Rojo
Segnalo
Shoutwire
Simpy
sk*rt
Slashdot
Sphere
Sphinn
Spurl.net
Squidoo
StumbleUpon
Technorati
ThisNext
Webride
Windows Live
Yahoo!
Email This to a Friend
If you like this then please subscribe to the
PERMALINK:
RSS
yeah, this is dumb. i got to their "on screen" names and thought that these people have never even played this game. and then it only get worse.
Hey... it might be funny if you knew anything about WoW. It's amazing that with over 10 million players in the world, you couldn't find ONE.
Vanna, could I buy a clue?
I like Obama, but seriously, that Fireball Limitation Act can't pass.
You guys should get someone who actually plays WoW to write articles like these. Then it might actually make sense and be funny.
Bonus points for interesting concept and funny pictures. Everything else is...lacking. As a player of WoW, most of the jokes don't make sense. If I wasn't looking at this from a player perspective, most still wouldn't make sense, nor would it be interesting.
One of them should have been Horde.
http://forthehorde.com
Very funny!! It may be more true then we realize.
wow quest help
our shaman doesnt exist. he disappeared for some reason. AHEM....MIKE!
Zomgzors, Mccain is Leetzorz pwnzorz.
In the Interwebz the l33tz pwnyzor is
Mccainz a gnomzor, ZOMG
GuTwReNcHeR = newb, but imho has mad rep and loot!!
Blood_Storm enchants r weak! procs like .5-1%!!1! No mats! No loot!
/t GuTwReNcHeR, kick Blood_Storm now! kthxbye!
Deathstalker49 draws too much aggro! thinks he's the tank! d00000000m!!!
/logout