May 13th at 2:53PM

Congressional Confidential: No Retreat, No Surrender

POSTED BY: TheInDecider

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Washington is no different from Hollywood -- it's full of famous names, ruthless backstabbers, and gossip bloggers willing to grossly exaggerate any anecdote to boost their readership. As former United States Senate Pages, Dylan and Ethan Ris were privy to backroom dealings, power grabs, and scandals that would make even Eliot Spitzer blush. Join the Pages as they get the dish on not just the presidential race but all the exciting triumphs and disgraces inside, outside, and below the Beltway!

Item! Presidential nominee-to-be Sen. John McCain (R-AZ) turned even redder than usual this weekend when it was revealed that his appointed GOP convention chairman Doug Goodyear once lobbied for the firm representing the Myanmar military junta! And just when we Pages had begun to fear that Monk-beating, cyclone-victim-neglecting dictators no longer had a voice in Washington! Embarrassing as this news may be, it still beats the plan proposed by former candidate Mitt Romney (R-MA), which was to outsource the entire convention to Myanmar. Nonetheless, look for this awkward snafu to be cleared up long before the Rev. John Hagee delivers the convention’s opening prayer on September 1st!

Who's the Boss? Speaking of John McCain, certain Nosey Nellies in Washington have questioned his choice of “No Surrender” as his presidential campaign theme, given that Sen. John Kerry (D-MA) had used Bruce Springsteen’s song of the same name in his bumbling attempt at the presidency in 2004.

Although McCain is not using the Boss as his personal soundtrack, tempers are rising on both sides of the aisle. Still, we Pages have it on good word that Sen. Kerry will defuse the situation with class by retroactively changing his campaign song to "Surrender" by Cheap Trick!

4 Comments
  1. McCain is going to use "Wango Tango" for his theme, It's eaither that or "YYZ" from Rush. He is on the fence.

    Buy OBAMA's breath at http://www.OBAMAir.com - it's commemorative and cool!

    by Dave K. May 20th at 10:30PM
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  2. I have an idea when Obama gets 1966 delegates maybe Howard Dean and the DNC can make their move by giving him the 59 split Michigan delegates that means Barack will become the Democratic Nominee that also means Hill can FINALLY DROPS OUT!!!! of this race then Obama faces Mac then last but not least Barack Obama will become our President of the United States if anyone don't like that well YOU CAN'T SEE CHANGE!!!!.

    by Rayshawn Ordway May 14th at 12:30PM
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  3. McSame should consider a song like "Onward Christian Soldiers, Marching Off to War!!!" It's old, it's pro-war, & would encourage all the right winged religious fanatics to sing along! Kerry & other Democrats could use the Guns & Roses song "I Don't Need Your Civil War". Dems could stand up and sing the gnr tune as they pass another war-funding bill in direct defiance of the majority of Americans. And all Americans could adopt the Genesis song "Land of Confusion" for a new national anthem.

    by mad maggie May 14th at 4:11AM
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  4. Note: that is my real name.
    I have not heard the following facts on any new cast..

    Electoral votes are the only votes that count in the general election.

    In state already decided Clinton lead Obama 247 to 221.

    If Florida and Michigan are included, Clinton leads 291 to 221.

    270 votes are needed to win.

    26 votes are yet to be decided.. If Obama win all of these states he

    would have 2247 votes, not the needed 270 votes.

    As to the number of states won, while winning 38 states and D.C. a person could still not win the election.

    The poplar vote is important only if considered state by state.

    by Clinton Whitehouse May 13th at 4:46PM
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