August 20th at 1:30PM

Rudy Giuliani to Give Keynote Speech at RNC, Presumably in Men's Clothing

POSTED BY: Eric March

I'm not sure if you remember, but about seven years ago, a few really angry guys flew some planes into some really tall buildings. Wacky, right? Anyway, there was a lot of sadness and hugging and people talking about being kind to their loved ones. Then we got really bomby and... well, you know the rest.

What's that? You say you don't know what I'm talking about? No bother. The RNC plans to remember you well.

Former New York City Mayor Rudy Giuliani will give the keynote address at the Republican National Convention next month.

First lady Laura Bush, California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger and John McCain's former Republican rivals will speak as well.

The theme will be "Country First" with four days devoted to service, reform, prosperity and peace.

No word yet on what the noun and the verb in his speech will be.

7 Comments
  1. you know they say that as you get older, not only do you forget things, but you act more like you were when you were a child. Compare and contrast the two? Even my 16 year old son could do a better (and more tactful) comparison--And what city could be more COSMOPOLITAN than NYC! I think he's losing it.

    by Tom September 4th at 5:02PM
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  2. I agree with the below:
    I found this speech disgusting. Again conflating Osama Bin Laden and Iraq- this is the kind of lie and use of fear tactics that this country is done with- time to say good bye to republican control of the white house and the last 8 years of torture. Good riddance.

    Giuliani, who by the way ran against McCain and bashed him but they are now best friends and he knows and now agrees with all of McCain's policies, was very demeaning and hypocritical.

    It's easy to put a spin on anything but the truth will weigh out. It's very easy to tell and spin lies--typical of the last 8yrs. We now want and need Change.

    In listening to his speech, we will have 4yrs of the same. What a very sad situation that would be.

    OBAMA '08

    by Paula September 4th at 1:58PM
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  3. He SLAMMED Obama, that was hilarious

    by Jeremy D. September 3rd at 10:41PM
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  4. Rudy who????

    by Janet September 2nd at 9:48PM
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  5. I think that,Rudy Giuliani should be the next president for the USA! No McCain or no Obama!!!! I really think he should run for president,as he handled 9/11 tragity very well! We need Giuliani to run for president!!!!!!

    by Nadine Marie Rody September 2nd at 8:33PM
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  6. Know why Biden's the clear choice? He boils everything down to a battle of Madd Libbs.

    by Risky Rev. August 20th at 8:39PM
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  7. he should totally show up in drag. it'd be a real ice breaker. they can use "man, i feel like a woman" as his intro song, everyone can laugh really hard, and then his long drone on 9/11 won't be quite as much a downer.

    by iowagradstudent August 20th at 2:28PM
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