August 27th at 2:45PM

Republicans Admit Global Warming is Not Caused by the Hand of God

POSTED BY: Ethan Ris

The committee charged with crafting the official Republican Party platform is wrapping up their work in Minneapolis this week, and they just dropped a bombshell. For the first time ever, the GOP platform will acknowledge that humans contribute to climate change. For those of you keeping score: that's Al Gore 1, The Omnipotence of God zero.

This is exciting news because Republicans have traditionally been loath to put any blame for global warming on human activity, especially industry or automobile emissions. In fact, the 2004 party platform didn't mention climate change at all, opting instead for a lengthy condemnation of gay marriage. However, with maverick John McCain at the helm the Republicans are finally loosening up on the issue of the environment.

And the platform committee isn't done yet! Keep an eye out for the GOP's acknowledgements of the human role in the state of the economy, the tension in the Middle East, and slavery.

3 Comments
  1. Come now, for the GOP do acknowledge the human role in the state of the eonomy, tension in the Middle East, and slavery, Palin would have to be convinced that human baby making results in human populations ... over her bloody lipstick. Ignorance is truly bliss, feigned or real, which is why she is a big hit with ignorant masses as she prances about like a cheerleader at a State University football game. As for THEM, OPINION is all that matters, as to whether or not it is INFORMED opinion is IRRELEVANT. Mass Tyranny = Fascism = Democracy, its all the same to them. An economy that can not crank out enough decently paying jobs and distribute goods decently for all 300 million Americans, somehow is expected to make all 6 billion population on planet earth rich, driving Humvees piled up with children and cheap plastic slavery produced trash to thier hearts desire with NO ecological consequences too boot. It does not take a rocket scientist a few seconds to sum this pie in the sky baloney as a huge hoax. But after 30 years the larger mass of the US population, to say less of the world, STILL doesn't get it.

    by Socialmedic September 16th at 5:29AM
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  2. In other news, Senator Jamees Inhofe was left out in the cold today...

    by davidm. August 27th at 4:40PM
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  3. They'd better not get an ounce of publicity out of this. That would be like praising the class clown when he finally stops throwing spitballs and listens to the teacher, which is what the other kids were doing all along.

    by Little Stevie August 27th at 3:05PM
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