August 28th at 4:30PM

John McCain's Economic Advisor Solves America's Health Care Crisis with Clerical Masterstroke

POSTED BY: Eric March

Experts agree that solving the health insurance crisis in this country, even if pursued vigorously, could take at least eight years.

Fortunately, John McCain's economic advisor John Goodman (yes, that John Goodman), has a plan to solve the crisis that can be implemented in eight seconds.

"I have a solution. And it will cost not one thin dime," Mr. Goodman said. "The next president of the United States should sign an executive order requiring the Census Bureau to cease and desist from describing any American - even illegal aliens - as uninsured. Instead, the bureau should categorize people according to the likely source of payment should they need care.

"So, there you have it. Voila! Problem solved."

Fuck yeah! I always suspected I could bring my grandfather back to life if I just stopped describing him as dead.

Can I also make John McCain's candidacy go away, if I stop describing it as viable?

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5 Comments

1. Less word-play, more real action. Vote for Change !

   by obamagramma August 28th at 8:59PM
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2. John McCain is a disgrace to vets. He drapes himself in vets, yet they come home to decrepit health care, and are sent out without body armor. Thank God Joe Biden helped get them at least that.

   by caligrrrrl August 28th at 7:47PM
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3. These are not the uninsured people you are looking for. He can go about his business. Move along.

   by bearness August 28th at 7:02PM
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4. Problem x? Change it to problem y. Problem x solved!

   I think this is one of those "washington things" Obama is trying to change.

   by Jasper August 28th at 4:51PM
   (Report This Comment)

5. Can I also make John McCain's candidacy go away, if I stop describing it as viable?

   I'd give you real money, and in vast amounts if you could make that work.

   by Scoopernicus August 28th at 4:42PM
   (Report This Comment)

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