Results for ‘Jim Gibbons’:

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October 20th at 1:03PM

Suing Nevada's Governor Offers Better Odds Than Blackjack

POSTED BY: Dylan Ris

If you're down on your luck in the Las Vegas casinos, you should consider an equally popular way to get rich in Nevada these days: Suing the governor!

Yes, it seems that taking Republican Governor Jim Gibbons to court is even more popular in Nevada than buying football picks from the Libertarian vice presidential candidate or getting robbed at gunpoint by O.J. Simpson.

In fact, suing Gibbons has gotten so trendy, it's happened twice in the past week alone! Gibbons' latest lawsuits accuse him of...

* Shoving a cocktail waitress against a wall in a parking garage and declaring "I'm going to rape you."

* Firing a state employee for blowing the whistle about the 867 dirty text messages he sent to the wife of a Reno podiatrist.

(And this will of course beget yet another lawsuit-- an intellectual property claim from ex-Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick, who already owns the patent on "dirty texting" scandals.)

So cash in Nevada! Every dollar you lost playing video slots and betting on the Dallas Cowboys can be reclaimed in just one single lawsuit against Gibbons. Cash, vehicles, more chips... it can all be yours.

Just don't expect the court to award you the governor's mansion. Gibbons' estranged wife beat you to that punch months ago.

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LAST COMMENT:

Gibbons is SOOOO lucky this isn't his re-election year.

by Jay October 21st at 3:53AM
2 Comments
June 17th at 10:38AM

Scandal Check-In

POSTED BY: TheInDecider

congressionalconfidential_2.jpg

Join former United States Senate Pages Dylan and Ethan Ris as they bring you the dish on not just the presidential race but all the exciting triumphs and disgraces inside, outside, and below the Beltway!

In recent weeks, Congressional Confidential has profiled a number of politicians whose careers have gone down like a five-figure whore on Eliot Spitzer (D-NY). The time has now come to check back in on them, and possibly roll them onto their stomachs to prevent asphyxiation. Here's how the past month's scandals have been unfolding:

Rep. Vito Fossella (R-NY) -- When we last heard from Fossella, he was breaking breathalyzer equipment with a 0.13 reading at a DC-area traffic stop. This, along with the discovery of his shadow family in Arlington, Virginia, prompted the five-term Congressman to cancel his re-election bid. But now word has surfaced that Fossella is employing the same private dicks that snooped for O.J. Simpson to defend him in his DWI case. The gumshoes, who have also worked for John Gotti and Patty Hearst, have recently been spotted "refreshing the memories" of employees at Logan's Tavern, the Washington bar that ejected Fossella hours before his arrest. When told by Fossella that they also had permission to break kneecaps, the investigators declined, reminding the Congressman that he was the one named Vito.

Rep. Laura Richardson (D-CA) -- Richardson made headlines last month when her third home was foreclosed by Washington Mutual and sold at auction. But in the wake of that scandal, word surfaced that the Congresswoman, who apparently receives accounting advice from Willie Nelson, once abandoned her BMW at a Long Beach auto garage rather than pay $735 to have it repaired. Richardson, a Long Beach City Councilwoman at the time, then began using a city-owned vehicle, put 31,000 miles on it in a year, and only surrendered it five days after she left office. While this is embarrassing news for a member of Congress, we hope that Richardson realizes that if she became a military contractor, she could be getting paid for this kind of thing.

Gov. Jim Gibbons (R-NV) -- Gibbons, of course, is America's favorite homeless Governor, whose wife ejected him from the Nevada Governor's Mansion following allegations of an affair. Since we last reported, details have been trickling out of Carson City, and we can now confirm that the Governor did in fact exchange 867 text messages in six weeks with the wife of a Reno podiatrist on a state-issued cell phone. Ninety-one of these messages occurred in one two-hour block between the hours of midnight and 2am -- which we assume was Gibbons's attempt to save the taxpayers money by texting at "off peak" hours. Still, even we Pages must admit that "dirty texting" is just about the most pathetic way to engage in a sex scandal. Just ask legendary Rep. Mark Foley (R-FL), who would argue that instant messaging is a far more erotic way to end one's career.

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