Results for ‘Tom Tancredo’:

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September 9th at 11:21AM

Tom Tancredo Now Babbling About Female Golfers - In English, of Course

POSTED BY: Dylan Ris

Will someone please give Tom Tancredo something to do? Clearly bored without a presidential campaign to pathetically lose, the far-right Colorado Congressman has instead taken on the solemn duty of trashing the LPGA for failing to enforce English as its official language...

Tancredo released a press statement on Friday, calling out the Ladies Professional Golf Association (LPGA) for having the gall to repeal a new and controversial proposal that would have changed the association's policy to require that all players speak English.

Tancredo's statement, released via his Congressional website, accuses the LPGA of cowering to "the politically correct left and 'immigrant rights' groups" -- which are of course well-known to hold massive sway over our nation's country clubs. No sir, you cannot spell "the politically correct left and 'immigrant rights' groups" without G-O-L-F.

But with all the issues currently facing Congress, why would Tancredo spend so much time railing about lady golfers?

Could it be because -- just throwing out a guess here -- only one week prior, Tancredo had personally authored an op-ed piece in the Washington Times that praised the LPGA for instituting the English-only rule?

Next thing he knows, he opens that same newspaper and learns the rule has been thrown out...

Talk about huevo on your face!

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Dylan, no! Let him rant senselessly about the LPGA and "English-Only"..; ANYTHING to keep him preoccupied until District 1's replacement is sworn in! Did anyone mention to him that it's not Spanish they're speaking out there....?

by Gia September 9th at 11:53PM
4 Comments
June 20th at 10:19AM

Catching Up With A Loser: Tom Tancredo

POSTED BY: TheInDecider

congressionalconfidential_2.jpg

Join former United States Senate Pages Dylan and Ethan Ris as they bring you the dish on not just the presidential race but all the exciting triumphs and disgraces inside, outside, and below the Beltway!

Catching Up With A Loser! Aging another year means presents for most people, but on December 20, 2007, Rep. Tom Tancredo (R-CO) gave a gift to America by dropping out of the presidential race for his 62nd birthday! This shrewd move makes Tancredo the fifth entry in Congressional Confidential’s lineup of 2008 presidential losers.

The Colorado Congressman had staked his candidacy on the single issue of stamping out illegal immigration, promising as president to institute widespread deportations, build a 50-foot fence along the Mexican border, and personally investigate the kitchen of every Arby's in Texas until the last undocumented immigrant was found. Tancredo's campaign slogan was pretty straightforward: "Secure the borders. Deport those who don't belong. Make sure they never come back." Doesn't quite have the same ring as "Change We Can Believe In" or "John McCain: Redder Than Ever."

Tancredo complicated his message of an illegal immigration crackdown by turning out to be (isn't it funny how this always happens?) employing illegal immigrants for repairs on his home. He also won plenty of questionable press coverage by suggesting that the United States retaliate for any future terrorist attacks by bombing Mecca and Medina -- which we assume would be coordinated with Al Qaeda's annual recruitment drive and telethon.

By late 2007, Tancredo was trying force other candidates out of the race by making desperate wagers, which failed to improve his chances but did result in Fred Thompson eating 85 hush puppies in ten minutes. With the odds growing dimmer by the minute, Tancredo finally decided to try a time-honored political "Hail Mary": Threatening to blow up an Iowa shopping mall. Shockingly, this failed to produce a bump in the polls, which forced Tancredo to enter his 63rd year as just another also-ran.

But cry no tears for this loser. Though he won't be President and he's not running for re-election to Congress, we're sure Tancredo will stay busy in retirement by screaming at Karl Rove, insulting the Pope, and receiving terrible service at Chipotle!

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